1. |
Stupid Cupid
02:51
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Stupid Cupid
Go and look what you’ve done
You made her fall in love
With my best friend John
Stupid Cupid
She was supposed to fall for me
Now I’ll never get to be with
The girl of my dreams
Oh I never should of
Put my trust in you
Bein’ an angel in a diaper
Should of been my first clue
I thought it’d be a good idea
It bein’ Valentine's and all
But now I’m regrettin’
Giving you that call
Stupid Cupid
Go and look what you’ve done
You made her fall in love
With my best friend John
Stupid Cupid
She was supposed to fall for me
Now I’ll never get to be with
The girl of my dreams
I paid a real good price
For that arrow that you shot
And when it comes to love
I thought you were the cream of the crop
Oh I’m leavin’ a bad review
And I’m gettin’ my money back
You call yourself a pro
But you’re nothin’ but a hack
Stupid Cupid
Go and look what you’ve done
You made her fall in love
With my best friend John
Stupid Cupid
She was supposed to fall for me
Now I’ll never get to be with
The girl of my dreams
Stupid Cupid
Go and look what you’ve done
You made her fall in love
With my best friend John
Stupid Cupid
She was supposed to fall for me
Now I’ll never get to be with
The girl of my dreams
Now I’ll never get to be with
The girl of my dreams
Stupid Cupid
credits
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2. |
11 Yellow Roses
03:16
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Eleven Yellow Roses showed up today
From your husband, the card did say
Such a sweet sweet thing for him to send
Then I started wonderin’ what it all meant
Does he think I’m an eleven out of ten
Purtier than pure perfection
Does he think that I’m too special for the colour red
Is that why he bought the yellow ones instead?
Oh Eleven Yellow Roses showed up today
From your husband, the card did say
Such a sweet sweet thing for him to send
Then I started wonderin’ what it all meant
Is he planning to leave me at 11 tonight?
Does he no longer want me as his wedded wife?
Oh I bet yellow is the colour of infidelity
And all this time he’s been runnin’ round on me
Oh Eleven Yellow Roses showed up today
From your husband, the card did say
Such a sweet sweet thing for him to send
Then I started wonderin’ what it all meant
What’s it mean boys?
When he got home from work
I asked him why, and then he said
There was a buy 10 get one free sale
And the store ran out of red...ugh
Oh Eleven Yellow Roses showed up today
From your husband, the card did say
Such a sweet sweet thing for him to send
Then I started wonderin’ what it all meant
Then I started wonderin’ what it all meant
Then I started wonderin’ what it all meant
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3. |
Opposites Attract
03:21
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She likes the real butter
I’m a margarine man
She can’t stand country music
I’m in a Honky Tonk band
We go together like gravy and cake
But we wouldn’t have it any other way
She’s a Pisces
I’m allergic to fish
She’s basketball tall
I’m four foot six
We go together just like night and day
But I wouldn’t have it any other way
Been readin’ all about how opposites attract
We’re living proof of that,
We don’t got a lot in common but we got what we need,
I got her and she’s got me
I got her and she’s got me
Oh she reads the news
I read Science Fiction
She’s an early birdy
I gotta sleep-in addiction
We go together like weddins’ n’ rain
But we wouldn’t have it any other way
Been readin’ all about how opposites attract
Were living proof of that,
We don’t got a lot in common but we got what we need,
I got her and she’s got me
I got her and she’s got me
Oh we might go together like a Buddhist and Christian
But you can’t start a fire without a little bit of friction
We might fight like the liberals and the tories
But underneath the sheets it's a whole other story
Been readin’ all about how opposites attract
Were living proof of that,
We don’t got a lot in common but we got what we need,
I got her and she’s got me
I got her and she’s got me
I got her and she’s got me
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4. |
Romance Novel
03:47
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He doesn’t like to explore
Ain’t into tryin’ things he ain’t tried before
I can’t get wild n’ freaky with my man
So I’ve taken matters into my own hands
In the pages of a romance novel
I get what I need
In the pages of a romance novel
I live out my fantasies
I don’t need to resist
Scratching that itch
Cause I get what I need
When I sit down and read
A romance novel
I don’t need to break my vows
Don’t even need to leave the house
I can do it right in front of him
And he has no idea what I’m imaginin’
In the pages of a romance novel
I get what I need
In the pages of a romance novel
I live out my fantasies
I don’t need to resist
Scratching that itch
Cause I get what I need
When I sit down and read
A romance novel
I’ve been with, cowboys n’ carpenters
criminals n’ cops
Had ménage et deuxs and ménage et trois
And there ain’t one position that I haven’t tried
Thanks to all the authors who have read my mind
In the pages of a romance novel
I get what I need
In the pages of a romance novel
I live out my fantasies
I don’t need to resist
Scratching that itch
Cause I get what I need
When I sit down and read
A romance novel
Oh I get what I need
When I sit down and read
A romance novel
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5. |
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They’re makin love below us
I can hear them through the floor
You’re sound asleep beside me
Like every night before
I know I shouldn’t listen
But I can’t help myself
I forgot what it sounds like
To be that close to someone else
Is it the four walls that surround us
Is there something wrong with this bed
If they were above us
Would we be makin’ love instead?
I can hear them underneath us
They’re laughin and carryn’ on
I use to make you laugh like that
But those days are gone
Is it the four walls that surround us
Is there something wrong with this bed
If they were above us
Would we be makin’ love instead?
There are things that get better with time
Like old baseball cards and bottles of wine
I used to think love worked that way
But we were better back then
They’re talkin’ down below us
I can hear them through the floor
We used to have lots to talk about
But we don’t talk much anymore
Is it the four walls that surround us
Is there something wrong with this bed
If they were above us
Would we be makin’ love instead?
If they were above us
Would we be makin’ love instead?
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6. |
Half of Everything
03:22
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My baby said it’s over, she don’t love me anymore
She took the ring off of her finger, said I'm filin' for divorce
She started runnin’ round the house, puttin’ her name on all my things
Said it’s a 50/50 split, so I get half of everything
Oh I get half of your records, from Mellencamp to Zeppelin
And half of your stupid baseball card collection
I get half of your gee-tars the Martin and the Gibson
And half of those rods that you use for fishin’
Oh I get half of the house and everything that's in it
Half of everything
Well I said baby you’re crazy, go and do what you need to do
But don't forget that I get half of your stuff too
I started runnin’ round the house, puttin’ my name on all her things
Said it’s a 50/50 split, so I get half of everything
Oh I get half of your shoes, high heels and leather boots
And half of those designer bags you think are so darn cute
I get half of your jewelry the diamonds and the pearls
And half of those rollers, you use to make your curls
Oh I get half of the house and everything that's in it
Half of everything
We came to a peaceful resolution
Like grown-ups often do
We divided everything
Evenly in two
Oh I got 30 inches of our 60 inch TV
She got the dryer, I got the washin' machine
Oh and she got the right side of our double bed
And don’t forget the dog, oh we each got half of him
We got half of the house and everything that's in it
Half of everything
We got half of the house and everything that's in it
Half of everything
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7. |
Brand New Heart
02:37
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I got a brand new heart just the other day
From a man named Jim who sadly passed away
It’s pink and it’s pumpin’ and it’s been workin’ like a charm
Tickin’ like the watch on a train conductor’s arm
Well it’s nothin’ like my old one that thing was a dud
One day outta the blue it just decided to give up
Well thank god I live in Canada cause they gave me one for free
Oh bless your little heart Jim cause now it’s inside of me
Well I’m not very fussy never one to complain
But ever since the surgery I’ve been feelin’ kinda strange
I started cravin’ cigarettes and hard liquor as well
My doctor says it’s normal but I think it’s somethin’ else
Cause I always hated baseball never watched a single game
Now I know every Blue Jay and all their middle names
And when I hear the name Sheila this damn thing skips a beat
I break out in a nervous sweat from my eyeballs to my feet
So I started gettin’ curious what this was all about
I made some calls read some books and asked Google for some help
But I couldn’t find an answer not even a God damned clue
Till I found what I was lookin’ for on the 6 o’clock news
First thing I saw was a mugshot then the hair on my neck stood straight
A reporter said a man was dead and his wife was locked away
Sheila killed her man with a frying pan while he watched baseball on TV
The scene was grim his name was Jim and his heart now beats in me
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8. |
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My baby’s been havin’ dreams about other men
Sometimes it’s a movie star other times it’s my best friend
I can hear her makin’ love to them every night
And when she’s done she takes the pillow and holds it oh so tight
When she’s awake she don’t break her vows
And she don’t run all over town
But when she’s sleepin’ she’s cheatin’ on me
When her eyes are open she wears her ring
And calls me her everything
But when she’s sleepin’ she’s cheatin’ on me
She said that she ain’t doin’ nothin’ wrong
That it ain’t a crime to dream about someone
She even started puttin’ lipstick on in bed
So she’d be good and ready for the men inside her head
When she’s awake she don’t break her vows
And she don’t run all over town
But when she’s sleepin’ she’s cheatin’ on me
When her eyes are open she wears her ring
And calls me her everything
But when she’s sleepin’ she’s cheatin’ on me
I read somewhere that we sleep
Through one third of our lives
So if we live till we’re 75
She’ll cheat on me
6033.33 times... approximately
When she’s awake she don’t break her vows
And she don’t run all over town
But when she’s sleepin’ she’s cheatin’ on me
When her eyes are open she wears her ring
And calls me her everything
But when she’s sleepin’ she’s cheatin’ on me
Oh when she’s sleepin’ she’s cheatin’ on me
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9. |
Breakup and Makeup
03:21
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You say things ain’t like they used to be
We use to make love so passionately
Now we schedule it in like a doctor’s appointment
And you’re findin’ it hard to really enjoy it
Well I got an idea to spice things up
Now I know you’re not into that role playin’ stuff
But just hear me out cause I think this could work
I think we could go back to the way things were
Ah kissin’ and huggin’ and luvin’ each other
Talkin’ real dirty to one another
The fire that’s burned out would reignite
Oh let’s gettin’ a fight, then breakup & makeup tonight
It'd be just like the honeymoon all over again
Non stop, real hot consimatin’
Tryin’ out every position in the Karma Sutra
From the Passion Pretzel to the Couch Canoodle
Ah kissin’ and huggin’ and luvin’ each other
Talkin’ real dirty to one another
The fire that’s burned out would reignite
Oh let’s gettin’ a fight, then breakup & makeup tonight
Oh call me an arsehole, a no good prick
I’ll call you crazy, then we’ll call it quits
You’ll apologize to me, I’ll apologize to you
Then we’ll make mad love the whole night through
Ah kissin’ and huggin’ and luvin’ each other
Talkin’ real dirty to one another
The fire that’s burned out would reignite
Oh let’s gettin’ a fight, then breakup & makeup tonight
Oh let’s gettin’ a fight, then breakup & makeup tonight
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10. |
God Walks into a Bar
01:48
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So God comes back to town
Like all those billboards said
It was finally time for him to judge
The livin’ and the dead
He runs to the nearest church
He swings open the big ol’ doors
He says I’m home everybody
You don’t have to pray anymore
But the church is cold and empty
There’s no one sittin’ in the pews
He checks all the other churches
But they’re all empty too
So he heads down to the shoppin’ mall
Where he knows lots of people will be
But when he arrives no one screams or says hi
He feels like a washed up celebrity
So he goes lookin’ for a bible at the bookstore
But he can’t find one on the shelves
Till he spots one in the fiction section
Next to a book about Santa Claus and his Elves
So he hits the road with that book of good news
And starts knockin’ on every door
But everyone that answers
Says they don’t believe in angels and demons no more
So God walks into a bar
Where he drinks way too many beers
And he asks the bartender
Why does no one have any faith round here?
Have you been livin’ under a rock?” the bartender says
Or did you just fall out of the sky?
Scientists made a pill
And if you take it you never die
And without fear of dyin’...well
People find no need to pray
Sure they still got their troubles
But with time most troubles go away
But what about Heaven God says
And all it’s eternal bliss
And what about Hell
And all it’s flaming fiery pits
Ahh no one cares about those places anymore
And why would they my friend
When they already have a life
That goes on and on and doesn’t end
I have an extra pill here
If you wanna give it a try
Why not God says
But when he swallows it he dies
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Scott MacKay Charlottetown, Prince Edward Island
Scott MacKay is a Prince Edward Island born songwriter & singer.
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supported by 4 fans who also own “Stupid Cupid”
I’m ramble old man driving my truck 365 days a year. I love this album it take you back to those old ramble days. I identified with this song (Ramble on) Definitely a great album to add to your collection. Keep up creating excellent music Charlie Marie! I love it! Awesome Music!
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